The Road Not Taken

Everything I learned about being an entrepreneur, I learned from my toddler!
Based on my soon-published book of the same title

Question #1: If there’s anyone out there out who has a toddler (or used to have a toddler), PLEASE RAISE YOUR HAND….

Question #2: Anyone who has (or had) a toddler during the time you are (were) starting your entrepreneurial endeavor, PLEASE RAISE YOUR HAND…

Question #3: Anyone who knows that the two don’t necessarily mix very well, PLEASE RAISE YOUR HAND…..

I noticed quite a few hands waving frantically on Question #3… and I completely understand.

Toddlers are – by definition: high-energy, talkative, daring, full of life, happy-go-lucky, always inquisitive, love-to-run, I-gotta-go potty, learning how to say “NO”, lovable, adorable little darlings! I have one such toddler… my first born son! But becoming an adult via “toddlerhood” and becoming an entrepreneur can indeed be similar to trying to mix oil and water: it can be frustrating. However…

Frustrations are part of the process

I knew when I decided to become an entrepreneur that there would be days when my life would be hectic and that there would be days of frustration. But when I was thinking ahead to these days, I must admit that I did NOT factor my now 2 1/2 year-old son into the equation! They tell me that toddler boys can take it to “another level” that toddler girls may not typically aspire to, and I believe that it’s true. When a toddler boy is determined to both “have fun” and “create havoc” at the same time, it’s a beautiful thing to behold! That is, unless you’re in the middle of trying to finish a proposal letter to a potential client, and your son wants to play with the printer and the fax and wants to sit on your lap to see the “pyooter” (“computer” for the uninitiated)!

So sometimes I need to adapt. I may need to ask my wife to come help out and lead our son to play with his baby brother or I may need to take some time to play with him. In either case, I’ve learned that working from my home office with a toddler is a challenge that is just a part of the territory. And it’s the same frustration associated with being an entrepreneur: we know that things – in fact, many things – will not go as we plan them to go. Adaptability is one of the required tools in the entrepreneur’s tool kit. We must learn to expect the unexpected so that we are not thrown off our set path.

Look for the seed

If we are expecting “smooth sailing” all along this entrepreneurial journey, we are mistaken. There will be times that “try our soul” as Thomas Paine mentioned during the Revolutionary War. In fact we not only need to expect unexpected frustrations, we need to “find the silver lining” in every situation that we encounter. That silver lining is ALWAYS there, we just need to look for it. Napoleon Hill put it this way: “Every adversity…carries with it the seed of an equivalent or greater benefit”. So we must look for the silver lining; we must look for the seed of the greater benefit in EVERY frustrating or difficult aspect of our business. When we do this, these times of frustration will serve as a vehicle for our continued growth and prosperity. So I began to look at my interactions with my toddler son from a different vantage point.

Setting the example

As I began to pay closer attention to my interactions with my son and to look for the seed of an equivalent or greater benefit, I started seeing his activities in a different light. While I’ve been seeking to set an example for him regarding growing and learning, he has, at the same time, been setting a wonderful example about living life in general and also being an entrepreneur.

It’s All About Fun

First and foremost, my son’s life is all about having fun! No matter what the situation, location or circumstance, you MUST be able to have fun! So whether he needs to be find some pots and pans in the kitchen, whether he needs to play with his dad’s shoes, whether he must use the laundry basket as a “choo-choo” train or whether he needs to play under the table at the seafood restaurant, life is all about having fun!

The lesson for the entrepreneur, of course, is that we must make sure that we are having fun (I dedicated an entire blog to this topic previously – “Even Entrepreneurs Need to Have Fun and Laugh”). The billionaire Richard Branson said that if a particular business venture he’s involved with is no longer “fun”, he asks “Why?” If he can’t modify the situation to make it fun, he moves to something else. Life is too short to spend all of your entrepreneurial energy chasing something that isn’t fun for you. When you are pursuing goals and accomplishments that are fun for you, you won’t need to “talk yourself” into reading, writing, doing research, marketing or any other necessary business activity. If we’re not having fun, what’s the point?

“I do it”

Since my son has become a toddler, he has developed many new physical skills. Accordingly he has also developed a newfound sense of independence and he wants to do more and more on his own. He likes to tell my wife and me, “I do it!” Letting us know in no uncertain terms that he is capable of 1) getting dressed (putting on his shoes, shirt, coat, doing his hair); 2) Going about his day (eating, opening doors, putting on his seat belt); and 3) going to bed (bathing, brushing teeth and turning out the light). My understanding is that he’ll go through similar episodes of independence somewhere around the age of 6 and again at 13 or 14. Should be an interesting time!

This quality of wanting to do it yourself is important for entrepreneurs because we really must take personal responsibilities for all of our actions. Yes, we must rely on others for their expertise. We have accountants, attorneys and financial planners. But we must make sure that WE check the figures, that we actually read the contracts and that we ensure all other consultants have performed the duties as agreed upon. We’ve all heard the saying and we must live by it: “The buck stops here”.

Full Throttle

From the time he wakes up at 6:30am (sometimes it’s 5:30) until the time he goes to bed, my son goes ALL OUT! He wakes up and immediately wants to go downstairs to start playing. He doesn’t care much about eating or having his clothes changed; he just wants to start his day! He’s gotten to the point where he doesn’t want to takes naps; he concerned that he’ll miss out on something!

As entrepreneurs, we cannot afford to let up. We will not get discouraged; we will give 100%! We are passionate about our businesses; we are excited about serving our customers; we are committed to the growth and professional advancement of our employees. Because we are pursuing our passion, we don’t mind getting up early or staying up late! Why? Because we’re doing exactly what we were meant to do!

What’s That, Daddy?

Every time my son and I go for a walk in the neighborhood (this has become less frequent since the weather has turned colder), the question that dominates the conversation is, “What’s that, Daddy?” Leaves… bugs… planes…cars…cats…dogs…squirrels…you name it. He asks about EVERYTHING! Even if he’s asked about it previously, he makes the inquiry.

So what’s the lesson for entrepreneurs? We must learn to be (and remain) constantly curious. We must question what the market is doing and how our strategic goals align with it; we must question whether we’re serving our customers in the best manner; we must ask whether we are maximizing our revenue; we must ask how the latest “widget” that our competitor just released will affect us; we must ask how the micro- and macroeconomics will affect our business. In short, we must always be in a questioning mode in order to stay on top!

Always Hungry

How can I say this delicately….my toddler son eats like a teenager! He gobbles food down as if he won’t be getting another meal. Furthermore, when he was a 10-month-old he would actually get impatient and start banging on his high chair table! He cleans his plate every time and always seems to be ready for more, even when the meal is done. Surprisingly, his weight is less than average for a kid his age (I suppose it’s because he’s “always on the go”)!

You’ve probably guessed where I’m going with this one! Entrepreneurs MUST stay hungry, or as Les Brown says “Hong Gray”! Every day entrepreneurs must behave as if it is our last meal. This is truer for some of us than others. Let me use an example: Do you recall the feelings you had when you first started out on your first entrepreneurial endeavor? There was a shortness of breath, a lump in your throat and tightness in your chest…EVERY day until your client base stabilized and your cash flow became more predictable. Well, this is the feeling and the attitude that we must maintain if we are to success beyond our wildest dreams. In essence, we should forget our accomplishments of the past and set a larger, more “hairy” goal that takes our breath away. Set a goal that you’re not so sure that you can reach and you’ll always be hungry.

“I’m Gonna Jump”

My son the acrobat! He’s constantly climbing things. At 2 ½ years old he is totally unafraid of high places. He very comfortably climbs the jungle gym for the bigger kids and is always ready to jump off. I’m not sure where he got this trait… well, actually I do. I also have a propensity to jump from high places. I blogged about it in a previous post (“This Entrepreneur Took the ACTUAL Leap”). While I’m not actually encouraging my son to climb on to tall objects and take a leap and I still watch him like a hawk, I’m sort of glad that he’s unafraid. I think that it will develop a sense of fearlessness in him.

Entrepreneurs must be unafraid to venture out into the unknown. In fact, that may be one of the main allurements of becoming an entrepreneur: the adventure of NOT knowing exactly what lies around every bend. One of my favorite poems is Robert Frost’s “The Road Not Taken”; “I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference”. Entrepreneurs must become comfortable with the unknown, because, try as we might, there will always be situations where we just don’t know the exact outcome. We must become comfortable with being uncomfortable and certain even in the face of uncertainty. That’s part of the thrill. That’s part of the exhilaration. Taking the leap is not at all like falling…it’s more like flying.

Final Learning

As you can see, entrepreneurs can learn a lot from toddlers (at least I have). You never know where ideas will come from for improving your business. And I guess that’s been the overall lesson that I’ve learned from my toddler. As an entrepreneur, I must never think I ever have enough knowledge or experience. I must always have the mindset of continuous learning and improvement.

Thanks for reading!

For the thrill of the jump,

Dino Herbert

Source: www.dinoherbert.com